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"Klumpies in the mist"

by

Bart Devreese

© Creative Conspiracy/Universal Music Belgium

FADE IN:

EXT. VARIOUS - DAY

Open on various signature sets IN THE PIPPLE TREE completely shrouded in a thick fog, e.g.: the Castle, the School, the Windmill. As a throwaway gag, a GENERIC KLUMPIE walks into a lamp post or a wall.

KLUMPIE

(Far off)

Ow!

EXT. PIAZZA - DAY

The Piazza is reduced to mere silhouettes of buildings. The lights from the shop windows are just coloured luminous blobs, identifying nothing. ELLA and SUNNY walk onto the Piazza.

SUNNY

Why are we doing this NOW?

ELLA

Because it's the start of the new SEASON, silly! In MY position, I simply can't AFFORD to be seen wearing OUTDATED dresses, you know!

SUNNY

Who could tell in this fog?

ELLA

(patronising laugh)

Oh, Sunny! Afraid of a spot of bad weather, are we?

SUNNY

(gritted teeth)

No, I just like to know where I AM. Never mind what I LOOK like!

ELLA

Ah, now, see, that's where you're simply wrong! You must always try to look your best! Of course, in YOUR case--

SUNNY

In MY case WHAT?

MONSTRUOUS VOICE (O.S.)

GROOOAAAAARGH

The girls freeze on the spot. From where they are (middle of the Piazza) all they can see are darker and brighter patches of fog. Ella clings to Sunny, who scrunches her eyes, trying to peer into the fog.

ELLA

What... What was THAT?!

SUNNY

Don't know. Sounded big, though.

ELLA

How... how big, do you think?

SUNNY

Oh, I don't know. About Klumpzilla-sized, I think?

ELLA

(freaking out)

Don't SAY that!

SUNNY

(mocking)

Well, at least you're looking your best, your highness!

MONSTRUOUS VOICE (O.S.)

(Much closer)

GROOOAAAAARGH

A HUGE, SHAMBLING SHAPE suddenly appears in the fog! A couple of loud THUMPS shake the ground. Now, both Ella and Sunny jump in each others arms.

ELLA & SUNNY

WHAAAAAAA! RUUUUUUUN!!

The girls take off.

INT. THRONEROOM - DAY

Sunny and Ella are standing before the KING and QUEEN. Also present are: BERTIE, CHIP, CAPTAIN BANG, GUARDS #1 and #2, ROLY BLUNK and a number of GENERIC KLUMPIES.

ELLA

It was GIGANTIC!--

SUNNY

Well, big, anyway--

ELLA And it had BIG CLAWS--

SUNNY What?--

ROLY

And HUGE teeth!

SUNNY

(spins around)

Wait, what?

ROLY

I saw it too! I was on my rounds, when this huge THING suddenly appeared! It ROARED at me and the ground shook with every step it took! I'm lucky to have gotten away!!

GENERIC KLUMPIE #1

I saw it too!

GENERIC KLUMPIE #2

Me too!

ALL

<worried murmurs>

KING KLUMP

Well... yes, well... erm... Captain Bang?

BANG

(salutes)

Sire!

KING KLUMP

Perhaps you should go and investigate?

BANG

(salutes, turns to Guard #1)

Yes, Sire! Private! Atteeeeen-shun! Apprehend suspected monster bearing claws plus teeth! On the double!

GUARD #1

(panicked)

Who, me?! It's just, er..., I was just about to... er... go clean my armour?

BERTIE (O.S.)

I'll go!

All eyes turn to Bertie.

BERTIE

I don't believe in monsters! I'm sure there's a simple explanation for all of this, and I'm going to go find out!

Bertie marches to the door of the throne room, then turns around.

BERTIE

Chip? Aren't you coming?

CHIP

(startled)

Huh? Oh, eh... yes. Yes.

EXT. PIAZZA - DAY

Bertie and Chip walk across the Piazza. Bertie's putting on a brave face, but Chip is very skittish. Everywhere they pass, doors are being bolted and window shutters are shut.

BERTIE

Everybody's panicking... But WE'RE not scared, are we, Chip?

CHIP

(swallows)

Yeah, sure. We're NOT scared...

MONSTRUOUS VOICE (O.S.)

GROOOAAAAARGH

The two friends huddle together. A couple of heavy thumps make the ground shake. Then everything's quiet again. Bertie mans up and tries to go on, but he can't, because Chip's hanging on to his arm and not moving an inch.

BERTIE

Come on, Chip! We've GOT to figure this out!

CHIP

(teeth chattering)

Yeah, I-I-I'm... not-scared. Not-scared-at-at-at-at-all...

BERTIE

Let's go! There's only ONE Klumpy who'll know what this is about!

The pair goes forth... cautiously.

INT. SEEFORTHS LAB - DAY

The doors to the lab are wide open and there are no lights on. Even indoors, the fog is present. Bertie and Chip peek around the doorframe.

BERTIE

Seeforth?

The two Klumpies enter the lab. Bertie looks around at the mess. Chip follows on his heels, teeth chattering and constantly looking back.

Bertie stops at a cluttered work bench and Chip bumps into him. Bertie, annoyed, turns and looks at him.

CHIP

S-s-s-s-sorry Bertie...

Bertie looks back at the work bench. On it lies a large blueprint and a strange bit of machinery.

CHIP

Where's S-s-s-Seeforth?

BERTIE

(pre-occupied)

I don't know...

CHIP

M-m-m-maybe the monster ATE him?

BERTIE

I don't think so...

MONSTRUOUS VOICE (O.S.)

(far off)

GROOOAAAAARGH

Bertie looks up and frowns. Chip ducks, eyes shut tight and teeth chattering even louder.

Bertie grabs the blueprint and the piece and heads out of the lab. Chip looks up, in a panic.

CHIP

Bertie?! Don't LEAVE me!

Chip frets, then rushes after Bertie.

CHIP

BERTIE!!

EXT. PIAZZA - DAY

Bertie marches up the Piazza. Chip runs after him, scared silly. Suddenly the HUGE, shambling shape RUSHES out of the fog, straight towards them!

MONSTRUOUS VOICE

GROOOAAAAARGH

A couple of earth-trembling thumps follow, as the shape comes ever closer! Chip rolls up into a little trembling ball

CHIP

(bawling)

AAAAAAAAH!! IT'S KLUMPZILLA! HE'S GONNA EAT US ALL! I DON'T WANNA DIE-IE-IE!!

Bertie looks from the blueprint to the advancing shape, then stands firm, in front of his friend. But as the huge shape comes within reach, even he can't help shutting his eyes and cringing a little.

Then the shape FINALLY emerges from the fog and it's... SEEFORTH!

SEEFORTH

Who's there? What's going on? Is anybody hurt?!

BERTIE

Phew!

Bertie sags in relief, while Seeforth peers myopically at him and Chip (still balled up and trembling).

Seeforth is pulling along a weirdly-shaped contraption, mounted on a pair of wheels. Every so often, a couple of pistons are slowly being pushed out of the tangle, hold for a minute, then shoot home with reverberating thumps.

Out of a trumpet-shaped pipe at the top comes a huge jet of smoke, making the pipe tremble with a low moan.

THE PIPE

GROAAAAAAARGH

SEEFORTH

Bertie? Is that you, my boy? By the great Pipple, am I glad to see you! You wouldn't happen to know where we are, would you, mmm? Can't see a thing in this blasted fog!

BERTIE

Seeforth! What are you... We're in the Piazza! But what are you DOING?! And what's THAT thing for?!

SEEFORTH

Huh? What? Oh! Oh, this! Oh, yes, well, fine bit of machinery, eh! I'm rather proud of it myself, actually. Not working properly right now, of course...

Bertie turns around and touches Chips shoulder.

CHIP

AAAAAAGH! NOOOO! DON'T EAT MEEEEE!

BERTIE

Chip! It's ok, it's just Seeforth!

Chip peeks through his fingers, then uncurls and gets up. He gapes up at the huge, heaving heap of bits and pieces.

CHIP

What's it do?

SEEFORTH

Hmmm? What? Oh! Didn't I say? It's a good-weather-maker!

Seeforth beams proudly at Bertie and Chip. They look up at the huge column of smoke coming out of the top. Seeforth notices it and deflates.

SEEFORTH

Erm, yes... It doesn't seem to work as I intended. All it does is belch out fog... It got so bad, I lost my way to the lab...

BERTIE

I think it may be missing a part.

SEEFORTH

Oh? Really? How can you tell?

BERTIE

Well, we went to your lab, and I found this blueprint...

SEEFORTH

Oh? And just from that you could tell there's a part missing? My boy, that's pure genius!

BERTIE

No, from that I knew you weren't a monster! But I also found this.

Bertie shows Seeforth the piece. Seeforth takes it and turns it around. Then suddenly his face lights up.

SEEFORTH

But of course! Of course! How silly of me! Wait just one moment!

Seeforth goes to the back of the contraption and starts tinkering with it.

SEEFORTH

(muttering)

Then this here... Attach that... there...

(loudly)

And VOILA!

Seeforth runs back to Bertie and Chip. The contraption stops belching out smoke. Slowly, the two pistons extend then hold. The whole thing begins to tremble slightly.

SEEFORTH

Now you'll see! Nothing but blue skies from here on out! All thanks to this marvelous device!

The shudder gets stronger and both Bertie and Chip take a step back. The machine lets out a strangled little sound, then... IT EXPLODES, with a great big shockwave!

EXT. VARIOUS - DAY

The blast makes the entire Klumpie Tree tremble and BLOWS away the fog hanging over Klumpietown.

EXT. PIAZZA - DAY

Various Klumpies open their doors and shutters to see what happened. King Klump, Queen Klumpetta and Sunny come running down from the castle.

SUNNY

What happened?

SEEFORTH (O.S.)

Victory!!

Seeforth is hanging from a branch, his clothes in tatters and covered in soot.

SEEFORTH

A bit more forceful than I anticipated, but still...

BERTIE (O.S.)

Yeah. Nothing but blue skies.

He and Chip are hanging from another branch. Everybody has a hearty laugh as the sun shines down from a clear blue sky.

FADE OUT.